Holy Moly....

So.......... we have been busy :-)

We finally managed to weed the garden. By the way, I'm still pondering a few things about that: why does my neighbor's garden have NO weeds and ours looks like a freakin' deserted front yard???? TWO wheel barrels later, it looks like a garden again and it looks FANTASTIC:-) And it really is peaceful to dig in the dirt. I've always viewed it as a "chore" but it's absolutely wonderful just sitting there in the dirt (with bug spray on of course) pulling out the bad weeds, shaking off the good dirt, and seeing your plants absorb the new sun.....

Now, we're onto the basement.... my "to do" list on the side bar should tell you a little bit about the basement. We both HATE it. I have, and still am, a pack rat. I save stuff so that I can use it in the future. The problem is that I save SO MUCH stuff that I can't get to the stuff I need now :-) But in the basement, cleaning stuff out, I still had a thought.... I was going through Ryan's stuff. His old clothes and all his tools and belongings.....

I find it amazing that we hold onto so much stuff in this life and in the end.... it means so little. I look at his clothes and I think, "what do I have this for?" Do I keep it to remember him by? Do I keep it so his kids can remember him? No. I really don't. The jeans he wore and his shirts are just a thing. A thing I need to let go of. In a previous blog I talked about owning his things and I know I took the easy way out. I put everything in a bag and put it in the basement. Out of sight, out of mind. Now going through it, I realize, it's not what keeps his memory alive. Granted, I will keep some of his things to give to his boys (baseball cards, comic books, a quilt made from his T-shirt collection, etc.) but the rest can go.... What I cherish most is the memories I have of him, not his things.....

It still amazes me though..... All we collect in a lifetime, and someone else comes along and just gets rid of it.... wouldn't that mean that we should cherish our lives more and not our stuff????
I remember him.... not his clothes....

One more thing.... I also remember John, going through all this STUFF with me. And I love him even more for taking it on with me..... helping me with a task I have put off for three years.... listening to me when I have a memory.... abd now he's part of my memory..... :-)