Friday, December 26, 2008

My Christmas Memory

So I have a ton of pictures and Christmas stories to share...

However, here is the one I am currently in love with.

We had discussed doing nothing for Christmas for each other. We get to enjoy each other on vacations, at alone time, little trips to Chicago, camping, etc. So we agreed there was no sense when money is tight to buy Christmas gifts for each other...

So I bought him a sledge hammer..... to chop wood with (sucky gift I know.... but I also believe in needed gifts... sorry, I'm rational.)

Here are my gifts:



Then all the kids finished opening their gifts.... and I noticed one more laying on the floor...

I asked John, "Hey! I have one more present. Do I get to open it?????" Amidst all the chaos of children playing with their toys, talking and fighting with each other, wrapping paper and bows scattered about, I open my final gift:

(The picture was taken in front of the place we first "met"... even though I'll tell you that we actually met on Match.com :-) Silly internet dating.... hmmmm.... seems to work well at some point...)

It took me a minute or two to put it all together. I was trying to figure out what the hell was going on with the picture.... when he got down on one knee and proposed to me.
Me, being the reasonable sledge hammer buyer, looked at him for a minute. Kinda absorbed the whole thing, and realized exactly what he was doing...
We had talked about getting married awhile ago. Yes, it seems fast, yes it seems soon, but yes, it feels so right.
Then again... I've always told him that actions speak louder then a ring or a diamond. I don't need any of that to make me happy. When you let me sleep in on saturday mornings, when you bring me coffee in bed, when you cook dinner if I don't want to, when you pound-lock-put a chain on it with the kids, when I watch you still carry your daughter to bed, when you do all this....
I know I love you. I said it before and I'll say it again. When you love someone, you just know it. You can feel it in your heart and soul.... It's something you can put your finger on and say, "Yep, I love that person."
John, I have been married before. I have done the planning and rituals. Yet this time I am amazed. When you proposed, I cried. I had a moment of clarity. I am so blessed and yet lucky at the same time. Remember? I've been blessed twice... and it's truely a blessing. How in the world did I ever get so fortunate to deserve such wonderful men in my life... The first was love. The father of my children. The man who let me still be me and I knew it was ok. Then, all of a sudden I was alone.... I wandered about for awhile in the vast single world.... I tried to be something I wasn't.
When I first "met" you, I was wearing pajamas (and you were wearing this GOD aweful Mr. Roger's sweater....). I never thought much of it... but it was strange. I kept running into you. I kept wanting to see you. I kept wanting to know you. I would see you driving down the street, next to me.... in your work uniform.... and I would feel a need to talk to you...
In some small way, I feel that Ryan paved the way for us.... I remember I was checking your MySpace (yeah, we're juvenile) and I heard this song: Matt Nathanson, Come on Get Higher... and it made me cry... and I asked you for a CD... and you made it for me. You let me come over to your house and still cared about me, even though the reason that brought me there was different then your's....
And today.... I love you more then you know. I get scared when I don't hear from you in a few hours... I love the feel of your finger tips touching me. I get angry with you at times, but anger is felt much more strongly when you love someone, and the forgiveness is much more quick... you are amazing.... right now as I write this, you're fixing ramen noodles for the hungry kids still awake in the house....
SO....
Yes. I'll marry you.
I'll love you until the end of us. I don't believe in divorce. I believe when you say you will marry someone, you will be with that person for the rest of your life. It's a commitment to you..... to us....


And by the way... I know you want to get married on a beach far away... but I want to get married here... with our family and friends present. I want to get married unconventionally and conventially at the same time.... Nina, Sarah, Casey.... I need help plannimg this fiasco :-)
I can't wait until this day arrives....
** John read this and said "That's so NICE." Remember, that whole anger is felt more strongly thing??? :-)***

9 comments:

ChiTown Girl said...

Oh, honey, I'm so happy for you guys! I was sooo excited when I got your text message on Christmas with the big announcement. You are both so blessed to have found each other, and I know you will continue to be happy together until the end of time. I hope your honeymoon will include a little layover in ChiTown....

Congratulations!!

three moons said...

*clap, clap, clap, clap*


yay!!!

This post has me feeling so effing emotional :-)

I am so happy for you guys. John, you are SO sweet. I just wanna give you a big kiss (oops, I tried that at the wedding and freaked you out. Maybe you'll settle for a hug? lol)


Bring on the fiasco :-)


congrats!

KBL 2 ORD 2 SAN 2 LUV said...

Hi Dana,

I'm a frequent reader of your blog. Got a hold of it from Chitown's blog. I think I may have even commented once, a long time ago, but not sure. I have loved keeping up with your boys and how you work to keep their father's memory alive.

I do want to comment today and tell you congratulations! You had a wonderful Christmas and there is nothing better than knowing you have the "one". Best wishes to you and John!

Lakeland Jo said...

congratulations. With all the bad news around at the moment it is wonderful to read some happy news. Blessings to both of you

HappyWifeHappyLife said...

Gosh, I don't even know you but I followed the link from ChiTownGirl over here and was just transfixed by how sweet this story was. Congratulations to you and your soon-to-be-husband! What a wonderful Christmas surprise! And what a wonderful way to start 2009! CONGRATS to you and your fiance!
-Happy Wife Happy Life

Melissa said...

So, I read your blog and I am very happy for you:) Sometimes people who are not here on earth with us are still helping and guiding our lives in spirit. Although I never knew the father of your children I am sure he helped you along in finding your soulmate. I know we haven't spent much time together in our young adult lives, but you were a wonderful person/friend back in the day. I wish you much luck and happiness..One of these days I plan to get a blog going..just hasn't happened yet. Let me know if you ever need anything:) Melissa Russell (king)

ButterflysDance said...

You know I'm happy for you girl. I believe John is and will continue to be a good father to the boys of your life. Maybe you two can have one or two of your own even? Remember, I am the last of Eleven!!! I love you and if your happy, I'm happy.

Miles To Go Before I Sleep...... said...

Thank you very much to all who cared to stop by and wish us congrats! :-) Beware, the new year is upon us!! Hence.... a new to-do list!!!

Lisa Anne said...

I am so happy for you and your family. You are both amazing people and any that know you are blessed to have you in their lives!!! Let me know if there is anything I can do to help. Miss you guys, need to get together soon! XOXO