Today I feel mad... like the rest of the world...

Ok, Ok, not like the last post where I was just being good old pissy pants me... but I'm mad today. Angry actually.....

I know this sounds silly to some of you but John and I have been dreaming of buying some land, living off the land, and reducing our impact on society as much as possible.... and at the same time cutting our bills in half, learning how to support ourselves WITHOUT the local Wal-Mart, giving our kids a little piece of land to run free and learn from, grow a flower/veggie farm, spend quality time with our kids instead of slaving away 9-5, even raising our own chickens!

We want this. We REALLY, REALLY, REALLY want this. We don't necessarily want to "live of the grid" or totally seperate ourselves from big cities, society, or our families. We just want to live how we want to live.

So we kinda developed a "4 year plan". In four years we want to be able to buy this piece of land and build a house ourselves. We want to not work in offices or restaurants. We want to not yell at the kids for getting too close to the street in front of our house. We want to not have to "hunt" for wood for our fire place but have it be available in our own back yard.

So today, in my infinate searching of knowledge on the internet.... I was looking around. At first I was researching concrete dome houses (I have posted a few pics before of one we have seen and I'm in love with it since then!). Then i started searching for earthen homes, cause I love those equally as much. And I stumbled across this.... it is truly our dream!

"For Sale in Western Illinois
$168,000

The Land: This parcel is 9.8 acres, the land is gently rolling and there is a combination of natural hardwood timber, pasture and evergreen trees that we have planted. The natural timber includes oak, hickory, walnut, ash, elm, hackle berry and choke cherry. We have also planted hundreds of trees; mostly white oak, white pine and various species of spruce. There are fruit trees, strawberries, red and black raspberries, grapes and blueberries planted on the property as well as a large garden with some raised beds.

We have made walking trails through the wooded areas and there is an area that would be very suited for a pond. There is a gentle south-facing slope that would be perfect to build an earth sheltered or underground home on. There are no trees to clear on this slope.

The Buildings: There are two buildings on the property. There is a 24 x 36 barn that is newly constructed in 2006. It has a loft area for extra storage and south facing low e-glass windows for natural lighting. There is an overhang on the south side where we currently have firewood stored and there is a water hydrant there as well.

The second building on the property is a very well insulated 36 x 45 Morton building that is seven years old. We have divided the interior of this building in half. One half of it serves as a large workshop/garage with lots of storage space, workbenches and a laundry/utility room. The other half of the building is modern living quarters. It has one bathroom, two bedrooms and an open great room with the kitchen, dining and living areas together as one. The kitchen has oak cabinets, a stainless steel sink with Delta faucet, gas stove and Kenmore dishwasher. There is a Vermont Castings Defiant catalytic wood stove in the great room that will heat the entire building. There is also an LP gas wall unit that we installed as a back up heat source when we are out of town and not here to stoke the wood stove.

The options for the finished living area are many. Anyone just starting out or ready to downsize could be comfortable living in it, as we have done. Or you could live here and store your extra belongings in the shop area while building your dream earth home. This would allow you to move here right away and live comfortably on-site during the construction process. After completing your home, this living area could be used for a home business, hobby area, guest quarters or a place for adult children or elderly parents to live (there are no steps or stairs).

The Surrounding Area: This property is located in rural western Illinois in the fertile heartland of the Midwest. The nearest town is Matherville. This is corn and soybean country and is a well-suited climate for the self-sufficiency minded who want to grow their own food.

From this property it is 20 miles to the Quad City International Airport. It is quite possible to commute to the Quad Cities from this property (this includes Moline, East Moline, and Rock Island in Illinois; Bettendorf and Davenport in Iowa) and there are many building supply stores and contractors there. For smaller town shopping there is a Wal-Mart and grocery store in Aledo, just 8 miles away. The local school system is Aledo Community District 201 and Illinois has very favorable home schooling laws.

Utilities and Other Information: This property is on a gravel road that is maintained by Preemption Township. It is 2-3 miles to the paved road. There is no homeowner's association and no restrictive covenants. MidAmerican Energy is our power company and Frontier is our telephone and Internet provider; we have reliable DSL service through them. The well is 420' deep and there is a septic system. The water heater is LP. We are including the stove, refrigerator, dishwasher, washing machine, LP clothes drier, high quality water softener (new in 2005), and reverse osmosis system (new in 2005) with the sale.
Included on the property are a small chicken coop and a child's play fort with a doublewide slide, colored solar lights and two swings. Included with a full offer is a 1,000-gallon LP tank with existing LP fuel and two gravity fed fuel storage tanks that each holds 300 gallons. "

So, there you go. And right now I'm angry. This is the first time I'm truly angry at myself for some of the decisions I've made and at the economy. Granted none of them were horrible decisions but hind sight is always 20/20. I'm mad that I chose to invest my money in the stock market. I'm mad that I didn't know what to do with it when Ryan died. I'm mad that the economy took such a raging SHIT that I have lost the TOTAL COST for this little piece of heaven in the F'ING stock market! So far, I have tried this whole "up beat" attitude thing. You know, the one that you tell yourself it will get better, everyone is suffereing, we should feel lucky we have 2 cars, a house, jobs, blah blah blah. Well today I'm not saying any of this. I know I can't change it but for once I just feel like joining the rest of the world at being pissed off at the governement, the money sucking big lending greedy ass banks and mortgage companies, the credit bureaus, even the president himself. I want to walk up to Wellsfargo, my Credit Union, even the fucking White House and give them the BIG 'OLE MIDDLE FINGER. I want to tell them that I, the average fucking american, who pays my bills and taxes, works for a living, is struggling to raise my family is PISSED OFF that I can't provide for them what I feel would give them so much in their lives because I CAN'T EVEN GET A FUCKING LOAN! I probably couldn't even sell my own damn house right now.

Well.... I don't feel much better but at least I got that off my chest.